A cautionary tale

Here I am, 9 days into ‘no booze, no cheese’ January, which so far has been a riot of healthy eating and healthy living, and what happens? I get sick. This is what comes of being too precipitate in cutting champagne out of my diet. Woman, even vegetarian woman, was not meant to live on vegetables alone, and chickpeas are no substitute for cheese. The plan was that I would be bright of eye and fresh of face, not whey-faced, watery-eyed and sneezing. Oh well, pass the tissues and the meth-making kit, may as well do something with the pseudephedrine while it’s to hand.

Not really. Drugs interest me even less than gambling does and I’d rather clean my bathroom than gamble. I don’t get the whole giving money away thing. I give you my money, and you give me, er, nothing? Oh, you give me the possibility of getting more money than I’ve given you in the first place? Pull the other one, mate, it’s got bells on. Instead, I will give this money to this nice person, who will give me an actual thing in return. That’s what I like to call ‘shopping’.

There is good shopping lined up for the future, because zoesmom and I are planning a little trip to Greenwich. I will be spending some of my freelance money, which, of course, is intended to pay for our summer holiday. Unfortunately, that is months away and it is quite beyond my power to let all that cash sit unattended in a bank account for months at a time. It is as much as I can do not to spend it as soon as the cheque clears. I’m working class, I spend my money as soon as I get it, before Something Goes Wrong and instead of a treat you have to pay to get Something Fixed. I mean, the Something has to be Fixed anyway, treat money or no. So, why spend the treat money on it? Why not get the Something Fixed and still enjoy the treat?

Thus my husband is in charge of our savings accounts. I can access them, but I don’t. Every now and then he tells me how much is in them and I get a little dizzy at the thought of all that money sitting there, uselessly. Although, in my prudent moments, I do like that we have a financial cushion, especially since it’s anyone’s guess what’s going on with our company but it would surprise no one to come to work and find that the company has been resold and now instead of books we make dogfood. Or rather, half of us make dogfood and the rest of us make our way to the exits.

So yes, security is good; but I’d also like to be wearing excellent shoes while teetering to the exit, and consoling myself with champagne when I get home.

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7 thoughts on “A cautionary tale

  1. emilybarton

    Like the new sight and hope you’re feeling better. I couldn’t agree with you more when it comes to treats v. paying to get Something Fixed. My treats, as you know, come in the form of specialty foods and specialty bath enhancers, oh yes, and books. Shoes are the one item of clothing for which I actually like to shop, so they also make the list.

  2. Zoesmom

    I am definitely looking forward to that shopping trip. Saving is just no fun. I’ll join you at the poor house. And even when the champagne is gone, we’ll still have the shoes and the bags to carry them in.

  3. musingsfromthesofa Post author

    Thanks Emily, and I am feeling better. I haven’t paid much attention to bath enhancers, but I think I may begin, to following a very nice Xmas present I got. I had my first bubble bath in years and it was fantastic.

    Zoesmom, we will poor but stylish. Since I’ve never had expectations of wealth, that’s about what I can hope for!

  4. Noble Savage

    Liking the new blog! Admittedly, I always like it when people switch to WordPress because it’s much easier for me to leave comments than it was on Blogger.

    P.S. — a life without cheese or booze is not a life worth living. 😉

  5. musingsfromthesofa Post author

    Hello NS, thank you! It’s definitely easier to comment with WordPress. Life without cheese and booze is really not that bad, honestly. For the most part, I just accept that they are out of reach for a bit and don’t think about it. And I feel so much better that it’s worth it.

  6. mandarine

    There is income tax, value added tax, gasoline tax… I have always thought of gambling as a stupidity tax.

    Just make sure you spend your hard-earned blue-collar banknotes on stuff that will not end up in a landfill or as dioxin within six months. My current criteria are: fair trade and/or local, lasting, reusable and/or recyclable, and therefore generally more expensive, which helps me buy less. Note: fashionable and lasting are contradictory.

  7. musingsfromthesofa Post author

    Mandarine
    I hate that fashion and lasting are contradictory but I know it’s true. It’s appalling. I like shopping, but I don’t like shopping for useless crap that will fall apart within 6 months. I expect my stuff to last and I’m willing to spend more so that it will, and to take care of it to ensure longevity. I also like natural fibres – but then where does dry-cleaning fit in, with all its horrible chemicals?
    I’m probably looking at buying a new handbag, and if I do it’ll be leather and I’ll be expecting it to see me through at least the next 10 years.

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